Time to take my stand.

My best friend, of the last 13 odd years, is gay. It wasn't something she decided to be one day. It wasn't a choice she made or lifestyle she liked. In fact for the last 10 years she tried so very hard to be a normal wife in a normal family.

She is also a Christian. a Follower of Jesus and a woman deeply devoted to God. For 10 years she tried her level best to be a good 'straight' christian wife , and live a normal heterosexual life. But eventually the pressures of living a life of lies got too much. Not being able to be who she was created to be , was slowly killing her. And it was killing me. And so at the end of 2008 we got divorced.

I still love and respect her deeply as a friend and as the mother of my child. And I wish for her all the best that life has to offer. I wish for her joy and happiness and love and peace. I realize that the path before her will not be an easy one. And so , for the little that it is worth, to her and fellow gay or lesbian people , I need to take a stand.

The church is so fond of saying :"love the sinner, but hate the sin". And, though I do not believe that being gay is a sin, I would like to follow this line of thought for a short while.

Jesus said something about loving people . He said "Love your neighbor as yourself".

So let me go with this for a while. As a human being I wish a couple of things for myself. Things like : health, a place to stay, friends, food, love....

Let us look at that one quickly. Love.... I wish for myself someone whom I can love and who can love me. A soul mate. My other half.

I do not want to grow old all alone. I do not want to be celibate. I want to have a soul mate , a lover, a partner. Yes , I want to enjoy the intimacy of sex. So how on earth can I wish these things for myself , yet turn around and say to Alet - you are not allowed to have these things.

I think that it is very, very easy for the church to stand at a distance and say "love the sinner, hate the sin". It is a lot more difficult to say this if it is to the face of some one you love and care for like a son , a daughter or a close friend.

I am convinced that for most gay / lesbian people , being gay was never a choice. It is the way they were born. How can I tell them that the way they were created is wrong. Is a sin. Is not good enough for God.

And so , I say this to any church that sprouts the gay is a sin slogan: You are wrong ! And I will not enter or be part of a church that supports that opinion.

I realize that there is a lot more to this debate , and it was never my intention to try and debate all the points, or cover all the issues. But it was my intention to give all who want to know , an insight into my stand on the subject.